One afternoon in 1994, Harvard wrestling coach Jay Weiss was sitting in his office on the fourth floor of the Malkin Athletic Center when women’s volleyball coach Jennifer Bates passed his door, a common occurrence since the volleyball courts are right outside his office.

At the time, the two coaches had just solidified their positions at Harvard—Jennifer had taken over the helm of women’s volleyball in 1993 and Jay had been hired a year later. They were colleagues and not much more.

“[In the beginning,] we didn’t know each other,” Jennifer said. “I was here before he was and then when he came in that year, we [became] friends.”

But that one afternoon, Jennifer did something simple that unwittingly sparked a relationship that has lasted longer than any winning streak or championship run.

“The door was open and she walked by, then she turned back and said, ‘Can I borrow a pencil?’” Jay recalled. “And I was like, ‘Okay, so this is where we’re going with it’...She obviously didn’t need a pencil. But then we got to know each other and we ended up running around the [Charles] River [together] for the first month to a year.”

Twenty years, hundreds of victories, 67 All-Ivy or All-American players, 16 years of marriage, and two kids later, Jay and Jennifer Weiss are still going strong as spouses and Crimson head coaches.

Separately, the Weisses would likely have done well and had solid coaching careers. But united, they have left a lasting mark on Harvard athletics both inside and outside of the MAC.

CONVERGING PATHS

Though Jay and Jennifer both began their coaching careers fresh out of college, they took divergent routes to becoming head coaches for the Crimson.

While Jennifer came to Harvard immediately after finishing her master’s degree, working as an intern in the athletic department and assistant coach for the volleyball team, Jay had multiple high level coaching experiences before coming to Cambridge.

“Out of college, I was the head wrestling coach at Moravian College in Division III, and I was there for two years,” Jay said “I knew I wanted to get back into Division I. The Brown assistant job opened up…. I went from being a head coach to an assistant coach, and was at Brown for two years.”

As fate would have it, the puzzle pieces fell into place for both Weisses to take on Harvard coaching positions. For Jay, that piece was applying for a Crimson wrestling coach position that he thought his former college coach at Franklin and Marshall was the frontrunner for.

By his own account, Jay wasn’t even shooting for the Crimson job but was hoping to fill the opening at Franklin and Marshall should his former coach get the Harvard position.

The outcome wasn’t exactly the one Jay had expected.

“[My old coach] got [the position], took it, and two days later turned it down and pushed for me, so Harvard called me back up,” Jay said. “I was in the right place at the right time…I was just fortunate to have that opportunity that many years ago.”