The man has an incredible control of the strike zone and throws about 98 consistently. Oh yeah, and he's almost legally blind and doesn't wear glasses or contacts when he pitches.

Says they get in the way.

A.L. Comeback Player of the Year

There could be a case made, I guess, for Doc Gooden, or Kevin Elster, or maybe even Darryl. But I would be kidding myself if I thought anyone could receive this particular honor but Lee Guetterman.

I don't even know what team he's on, but the dude had dropped off the face of the Earth, and I definitely saw him pitch in some game this year.

Sorry Doc.

N.L. Rookie of the Year

Fernando Valenzuela. I have a feeling he's pitched before, but he claims he's only 22, so why argue?

In other words, the end-of-season baseball awards should be treated with the same frivolity with which I treat my statistics class.

It's nice to hear that one of your favorite players was recognized on the national stage. But after the last pitch of the World Series is thrown, the important things in life will become basketball, football, and the Simpson's season premiere (though not necessarily in that order).