1. Build a bow and arrow out of a clothes hanger.

2. Eat a lot of pita bread. (Get it?).

3. Rewatch the first “Hunger Games” and take a shot anytime someone dies (two shots if it’s especially gruesome. I’m looking at you, Rue).

4. Play a game of MASH with Finnick, Peeta, Gale, and Haymitch Abernathy as future husband options. Cross your fingers and hope for Haymitch.

5. There are twelve districts of Panem and twelve Harvard houses. Coincidence? Surely not. Find and move to House 13, an underground land of revolution. (Hint: it’s probably the Co-Op).

6. Lead a rebellion against President Faust. Prepare to fight against her “Peacekeepers” (HUPD).

7. Aggressively train like the tributes at the MAC for the Quarter Quell. If anyone asks why you are throwing a javelin in the elliptical room, explain that you can’t speak to anyone who’s not in your district.

8. Yell out “I volunteer as tribute!” as loud as possible during section when no one else is willing to talk about a reading.