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BALM-OFF:three critical perspectives

Fifteen Minutes regrets to inform the general public of a tragic accident which has befallen two magazine staff writers. On Saturday, Feb. 27, 1999, Ginnie and Russell Independence of Colorado Springs, Colo. were found dead on a mountain in Lake Placid, N.Y. Sources inform FM that Mr. and Mrs. Independence suffered fatal injuries as a result of skiing while under the influence of alcohol. The coroner's report found concentrations of the following substances in the blood of the two victims: 12 eggs, separated1 quart heavy cream 1 1/2 cups superfine  1 quart milk sugar  1 quart bourbon cracked ice  nutmeg

Friends of the couple have informed FM that the drink was called "Rus's Killer Nog." (FM is currently accepting applications for the position of Winter Visionary.

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