It's a good thing we're not counting on beating the Axis with the patriotic ballads that have been written since Pearl Harbor, because if we were, we would be in a pretty tough spot, but without a paddle. It's bad enough to hear bulletins telling of Japs in Malaya, Nazis in Libya, and U-boats off the Atlantic coast without having to take an ironic slap in the face when these bulletins are followed by a peachy little vocal trio telling us in anemic harmony to Remember Pearl Harbor, to Keep 'Em Flying, and that We Did It Before And We'll Do It Again, and all right for you, Adolf Hitler, you just stop being so mean or we'll give you a great big slap on the wrist, you nasty thing you.

The trouble with these songs is not so much that they're lousy music --that goes without saying--what's really annoying is the fact that the so-called patriotic tunes of World War II are weak little sissy ditties which are no more representative of a fighting-mad nation than they are a tribute to the armed forces which they eulogize. Maybe I'm just a copperhead, but when I hear this kind of trash I can't help thinking of a little boy shouting at the local bully "Just you wait till my big brother gets after you." Another thing, don't forget that these songs are the product of that lucre-loving, back-stabbing boulevard known as Tin Pan Alley. Therefore, they are by definition a commodity, written, composed, and played in a commercial rather than a patriotic spirit. Finally, I don't think it's quite fair to America to call them American songs-- they're not even Japanese.

What is American, however, is jazz music. It's a virile, exuberant, healthy expression of our freedom and strength. And as far as the songs are concerned, I can't see what's wrong with the old ones. Military music and jazz have always been quite close to one another. None of us, of course, is old enough to remember the New Orleans street bands, but if you'll listen to Bob Crosby's recording of "South Rampart Street Parade," you'll get an idea of the kind of stimulating, exciting music they played. I don't think it would be in any way sacrilegious to put a nice solid two-beat on tunes like "The Marine's Hymn," "The Caissons Go Rolling Along," and "Anchors Aweigh." In fact, the most patriotic music I ever heard was down at Nick's when a rough and tough little Dixicland outfit picked up "The Stars And Stripes Forever," and really gave it a workout. When they knocked out the final bars, I thought, Hell, how can we lose?